Nursery Rhymes: Behind the Scenes

 

Introduction

     Have you ever wondered how Little Bo Peep lost her sheep? Or the reason that Humpty Dumpty, a highly fragile egg, was sitting on a wall in the first place? Or, if the Queen of Hearts wanted tarts, why not have a servant make them? If you have questions, I have answers. So sit back, relax, read, and most important, enjoy!

                        Sima Simpson

 

 

Chapter 1: Little Bo Peep

  Now, lets go over what we know about Little Bo Peep.

Little Bo was a young shepherd girl who somehow lost her sheep. Now, I would like to know, how could a shepherd lose its sheep? A shepherd’s whole job is just to watch them and keep them safe. There are only a few reasons that a shepherd might lose its sheep.

A. Irresponsibility

B.  He was daydreaming. (irresponsibility)

C.  He fell asleep (irresponsibility)

So obviously, Little Bo Peep had simply fallen asleep or something, and then the sheep got away and were lost until they decided to come home. Right?

Wrong. That is not what happened. What really happened? The answer is: rebellion.

Every year, Bo Peep would have the “annual sheep shave”, where she would shave off all the wool that the sheep had grown in the past year. She wood use the wool to make pillows.

The sheep felt that, since it was their wool after all, they should get at least a fourth of the pillows, minimum. But Bo Peep did not care. Sheep live in stables, and stables have hay, not pillows, in her opinion. The sheep got so fed up with Bo Peep, that one day, when she took them out to graze, they ran off, and before Bo Peep knew what had hit her, the sheep were gone. She searched for them for hour’s, but could not find them. The sheep, meanwhile, realized that they could not survive on their own in the wild without Bo Peep to feed them and give them shelter. So they came home like good little sheep and lived happily ever after the end. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 2: Humpty Dumpty

What do we know about Humpty Dumpty? He was an egg who sat on a wall and fell off, and the king’s horses and men could not put him back together.

Now I would like to ask a few questions before I give answers.

Question number 1: Why was a fragile and highly breakable egg sitting on a wall?

Question number 2: Why were the king’s horses and men trying to put Humpty together again? Why not the king’s royal surgeon?

The answer is that the hens did not lay enough eggs that morning.

The king’s guards’ and their horses loved nothing more than a nice fried egg. Every morning, the castle chefs would prepare delicious fried eggs for the castle guards. They would eat it with fresh toast and silky tomato sauce and fluffy muffins with chocolate…

The point is, the castle guards loved nothing more than a fried egg. All of the guards, that is, except for Sir Humpty Dumpty, who stood guard at the top of the North Wall, and who also happened to be a giant egg.

Anyway, one day the kingdom was invaded by and a neighboring country, and before long, the king’s castle was besieged. Soon food supplies began to run low, which meant less corn for the chickens, which meant less eggs. Since there were not enough eggs, the guards were given only bread and butter for breakfast. The guards were going mad. They felt they would do ANYTHING for just a taste of fried egg.

One day, a sentry guard named Sir Jacob was at his post, his stomach aching in longing for a fried egg, when he spotted Sir Humpty, up on the castle wall.  And then it hit him; they could fry SIR HUMPTY! So maddened by hunger, not even thinking what a horrible idea this was, Sir Jacob took out his sling and shot a rock at Sir Humpty, making the poor egg fell off the wall. He fell seventy feet, and shattered in a pile of mud, and therefore becoming inedible.

Sir Jacob suddenly came to his senses and realized what he had done. Immediately, him and the rest of the king’s men attempted to put Sir Humpty back together with gorilla glue, but it was no use. And so, the whole ordeal was covered up, and to this day, Humpty Dumpty is accused of a careless act that he never committed.

Chapter 3: The Queen of Hearts

 

The Queen of Hearts,

She made some tarts

All on a summer’s day.

The knave of hearts

He stole those tarts

And took them clean away.

The King of Hearts

Asked for the tarts

And beat the knave full score.

The knave of hearts

Brought back the tarts

And vowed he’d steal no more.

Cute story, right? Well I have a few questions about this  Nursery Rhyme.

1.  If the King of Hearts wanted tarts, why make the queen do it? Why not the castle chefs?

2.  Why would the knave of hearts steal a tart from the king? Is it really so hard to go down to the bakery, or at least steal from the town bakery, but from the KING? Does this guy have a prison wish?

Obviously, we’re missing a lot of pieces to the puzzle, and those pieces have been found.

The reason the Queen of Hearts was baking the tarts and not a servant, is that the queen had uncovered a plot among the servants to steal the crown jewels. So she baked the crown jewels IN A TART, and then tried to serve them to the king, who would be able to keep the, safe until all the traitors were in custody. But the Queen of Hearts plan was discovered by the Knave of Hearts, who was in league with the traitorous servants. The knave stole the tarts, but was ordered by the King of Hearts to bring them back.

                             

 

 

 

 

Epilogue

Now that I have asked all the questions and answered all the answers about those three nursery rhymes, I have a small confession to make.

None of that stuff ever happened.

I know what you’re thinking. “What?! She made all that up? But it made so much sense!”  But it’s true. I thought up of a different scenario for each rhyme in a way that I thought made sense. And so, now that you have seen an excellent example (if I may say so myself), you can go, and write your own reasons for different happenings in nursery rhymes!