The Best Country in the World

 Note: This story was originally written by me and my bunkmates in Camp Azamra, for an international day skit. In our skit, we sang "the song of harmony" from Peppa Pig, but I decided to come up with something a little more...original.

The countries of the world were having a debate over which country was the best place in the world. Only the country of Israel remained quiet and stayed in the shadows.

“This conversation is pointless.” Said America. “Everyone knows that the good old USA is the best. We have the best tourist attractions and the best food.”

“Yeah right.” Snorted Italy. “You want good food, go to Italy. And pizza, America's so-called best food, isn’t American, pizza is Italian. And Italy has got more history and tourist attractions in one city than America has in the whole country.”

“GOOD FOOD?! HA!” spat France. “YOU CALL YOUR PASTA AND CHEESE AND TOMATOES GOOD FOOD? THE ONLY GOOD FOOD IN THE WORLD IS FRENCH CUISINE!” “Yeah.” Muttered Italy. “If you like snails and frogs legs.” France was furious. “WE HAVE OPEN MINDS!” she screamed. “AND IN FASHION AS WELL AS FOOD!”

“Good fashion? You call the rags you wear GOOD FASHION?” sneered Spain. “Looks like someone needs a trip to Spain to learn how to dress well. “

“GOOD FASHION!” Japan shrieked with laughter. “Do you mean those ridiculous clothes you Spaniards wear in a bullfight?” she hooted with gales of laughter again. “Its not enough to look elegant, which Spanish clothes certainly do not, but you must ACT elegant too. And one could hardly call bullfights even remotely charming.”

“Yes because everyone knows that the Japanese are SO charming and elegant,” England said as he rolled his eyes. “I could go on for HOURS about how England is the most elegant and polite country in the world…”

 At that moment, the argument became one giant free for all. All the countries of the world were yelling, screaming, and shouting, each trying to state that he or she was the best country in the world. All of the countries, that is accept Israel, who remained in the shadows and didn’t say a word. It was chaos, everyone yelling and shrieking, insulting each other  and screaming…”

SILENCE!” someone yelled. “THE GLOBE WISHES TO SPEAK!” A hush spread over the countries, and everyone stopped fighting. When there was complete silence, the Globe began to speak.  

“It has come to my attention,” said the globe merrily. “That you all have been having a bit of a skirmish .” He glanced around the room. Japan and Greece immediately stopped trying to break each other's limbs. 

“and I,” the Globe continued as he settled in a squashy armchair. “I have come to settle it.” His eyes skimmed the room again. 

“But where is the dear country of Isreal? I do believe that she is the only one who hasn’t had a say yet.” All the countries looked at each other with fright. 

“Do you mean to say,” America's voice quivered. “That you heard our…uh…discussion…” he gulped. “All…all the way from wherever you were?”   The Globe rolled his eyes. 

“Oh, for heaven's sake, you’re all tone deaf. I could hear you all the way from The Bahamas; you were all screaming and insulting each other so loudly. So anyway,” the Globe searched one more time around the room. “Where is Isreal? She hasn’t said a single word this whole time, the little nipper…” 

“He never calls ME little nipper.” Complained Kuwait. No one paid him any attention. 

Isreal stepped out of the shadows, blushing, keeping her head bent down and not making eye contact with anyone. 

“So Israel,” said the Globe “Why do YOU think you’re the best of the countries? Cuisine? Fashion? Manners?” Israel stared at the ground and mumbled something about being “Unworthy”. 

“AHA!” roared the Globe. All the countries jumped. “HUMILITY! That’s not something you’ll find people bragging about!” He thought for a second, then roared with laughter at his own joke, making everyone jumped again. 

“Uh…your Globiness.” Mumbled America. “ That…that was a terrible joke.” The Globe stopped laughing. 

“yeah maybe.” He said. “but anyway…” The Globe turned to Israel. “Humility isn’t found in everyone.” He said, gesturing at the other countries. “It’s a valuable trait.” He spread out his hands. “And for that reason, I declare you the best of all the countries!” He smiled joyously at all the countries. 

“Ok, now that’s settled I’m back to the Bahamas.” And the Globe left the room.

In honor of that day, all the countries decided to write a song of harmony, which they sung every year on International Harmony Day.

The Song of Harmony

To the tune of  Row row row your boat

All of us together,

Singing forever,

Not a fight and not a war,

In mostly perfect harmony.

Singing with each other,

Sorta kinda like sister and brother

Not a fight and not a war

In mostly perfect Harmony